There’s a Place for Us

While at San Marcos, Shane has been enrolled in Ki Charter Academy, a public charter school on the grounds of the treatment center. It’s a totally separate entity of San Marcos Treatment Center. All kids enrolled in the treatment center attend Ki Charter, but not all kids there are from the treatment center. School has been a huge issue and challenge for Shane and we were worried about how he would handle the academic setting surrounded by peers.

When Shane was as young as two, we couldn’t even leave him at the Y long enough to work out without them calling us to come get him. Every daycare decided that he “wasn’t a good fit” for their program. Once it was time for him to start kindergarten, we enrolled him into the public school and within a few weeks, he’d been suspended several times for throwing erasers, knocking over a chair, pushing a kid, etc. The public school refused to accept the diagnoses and testing we had from doctors and insisted on doing their own evaluations before making any changes or accommodations. Each time they called me to pick him up, I went and scooped him up in tears (both of us). We decided to pull him out when we found Cyzner Institute which was a small private school that provided ABA therapy and a small teacher to student ratio. Even in a class with 6-8 kids, Shane wasn’t successful and instead of leaving him in the classroom to help him build social skills, they insisted on one-on-one instruction. No one would give him a chance. So, Shane’s entire academics have always been one-on-one which is why we were so anxious about him starting at Ki Charter Academy. But, we were hopeful.

As soon as it was obvious that he was struggling behaviorally and academically in a somewhat traditional classroom setting, I discussed having Shane tested for special education services and began wondering what else could be done to help him. With Ki Charter, I got immediate cooperation. They tested him over a period of a couple of months, repeating some tests multiple times because the results were so drastically different each time. They didn’t accept his refusal to perform particular tasks as his inability to learn. They were diligent and took a genuine interest in trying to figure out what makes him tick.

Yesterday, we had our first IEP meeting. I’ve heard horror stories from parents about their IEP meetings. Scott and I sat at the table and listened to the results and their interpretations of Shane. Most of what they said was no surprise. But, some things were amazing. They agreed that he needs extra support in various subjects and that it would be put into place immediately. They talked about how creative, funny and curious he is. It’s no surprise that he struggles with peer interaction. He’s never experienced it. I braced myself waiting to hear the “your kid needs one-on-one” instruction. They said the opposite. They want him to remain in class with peers. Such a pleasant surprise. They believe in him and are giving him a chance to find success. We spent the next few minutes after the call in silence and tears wondering why we didn’t fight harder for Shane at other places once again placing blame squarely on our shoulders.

We anticipate our insurance running out for the treatment center toward the end of March. Because Ki Charter has put so much care into helping Shane learn to navigate “real school” with peers, we want him to finish out the school year there. It would be virtually impossible to expect Shane to come back to South Carolina and be successful with only a couple of months left in the school year.

On March 1, we’ll be packing up Memphis and Tux and heading to San Marcos planning to stay through the middle of July. That will give Shane the opportunity to continue at Ki Charter learning to interact appropriately with peers in an academic setting under a staff trained in special education and undoubtedly passionate about their work. The last day of school is June 1, but Shane has been granted permission to continue for six more weeks in their summer program. It is our hope that he will also be able to successfully join some summer camps like “real” kids (his words).

I’m excited about our little place on the river in San Marcos. Tears dry faster in the sun. I may not ever want to leave. I can easily say that the last year has been the most challenging year of our lives. But, at this moment, I can finally breathe knowing that for right now, for Shane, there’s a place for us.

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